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BigHappyJack

My car might not start.

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Just a bit of fun.  Not too serious.

 

My car might not start.

 

V

I can’t come out to your house ‘cos my car might not start

I took it to a guy and he ordered a part

He'll send me a text 

on the Tuesday after next

But I cant come out to your house as my car may not start

 

V

I’d love to have a picnic but I’m busy that week

My workload is a monster and my boss is a freak

I’m up against a cutoff

And I’ll have to turn my phone off

A picnic sounds intriguing but I’m busy that week

 

C

I’m sure you’re nice and a wonderful person

I hope your life is as good as can be

I hope you find just the perfect companion

But I’m pretty sure it’s not me.

 

V

I can’t go to the movies ‘cos my Doctor said so

It’s a serious condition that I’m sure you don’t know

I’m screaming like an air horn

When I get close to popcorn

A movie wouldn’t work because my Doctor said so.

 

V

I’m sure I can’t go dancing with my knee as it is

There are bubbles in my tendons and they all tend to fizz

It puts me in such pain

I might never walk again

So there will be no dancing with my knee like it is

 

C

I’m sure you’re nice and a wonderful person

I hope your life is as nice as can be

I hope you find just the perfect companion

But I’m pretty sure it’s not me.

I’m pretty sure it’s not me

 

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V V C
V V C

My Car Might Not Start 
Reminds me of 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover, only it's a list of ways to avoid a suitor, a list of phony excuses. 
Being courted, perhaps somewhat persistently,  by someone toward whom you have no interest is nicely chosen angle and would surely be universally understood. What to say?! It's part of the glue of society that we not hurt each other's feelings. This lyric would hurt someone's feelings but not in this instance because it isn't aimed at anyone real and because it's expressed comically. The meter is almost a limerick, which lends itself to humor.

V1
I can’t come out to your house ‘cos my car might not start

I took it to a guy and he ordered a part

He'll send me a text 

on the Tuesday after next

But I cant come out to your house as my car may not start   [good beginning statement of the case]

V

I’d love to have a picnic but I’m busy that week

My workload's a monster. My boss is a freak.

I’m up against a cutoff

And I’ll have to turn my phone off

A picnic sounds intriguing but I’m busy that week

 

C

I’m sure you’re nice and a wonderful person.

I hope your life is as good as can be.

I hope you find just the perfect companion                  [I'm sure you'll encounter the perfect companion?]

But I’m pretty sure it’s not me.                                   [Wonderfully succinct, probably the real title]

 

V

I can’t go to the movies ‘cos my Doctor said so           doctor

It’s a serious condition that I’m sure you don’t know

I’m screaming like an air horn

When I get close to popcorn                                       [that's a stretch to me]

A movie wouldn’t work because my Doctor said so.
 

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Thanx, Ron.  I always get nervous when I get a bunch of views but no comments.  It makes me think everyone hated it.

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Hi Jack

        Don’t mind me—just catching up.  I agree it’s kind of silly and light hearted, but nothing wrong with that at all. I doubt if anyone hated this. I have noticed over the years that some people’s sense of humor is far more or less developed than other people’s.  I tend to look for the humor in things. I think you do too. 

         A lot of the storyteller musicians throw in a light hearted funny one just to mix up the mood a little during a show. Or else they tell a funny story. I remember Joe Walsh bantering inbetween songs about visiting his grandfather as he lay dying in the hospital. His grandfather’s last words to him were supposedly “Joseph, sorry about the nose.” Which Joe must have inherited from him.  

        The cadence of beginnings of each verse reads a little different but that might be a good thing as I’m sure it’s intentional.  The very last line of the final chorus (the added 5th line) is a logical place to add a final zinger such as.... I’m pretty happy for sure it’s not me.... if you were so inclined.  

       I think this is pretty good. Maybe the popcorn line could be tweaked into sneeze like a foghorn (allergies?). Good job!

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Hey Jack.

 

This is an enjoyable little song. It's an antiquated style, but don't let that stop you.

 

I thought a few lines could use a little tweaking:

 

I can’t come out to your house ‘cos my car might not start

I took it to a guy and he ordered a part   -> The meter is weird on this. I wanted it to say "ordered ME a part" or something like that.

He'll send me a text 

on the Tuesday after next

But I cant come out to your house as my car may not start

 

V

I’d love to have a picnic but I’m busy that week

My workload is a monster and my boss is a freak -> again, the meter feels weird. And this is more syllables than you used in the first stanza. "SUCH a freak"?

I’m up against a cutoff -> "I will have to work my stones off" might be better. I don't know what a "cutoff" is (i'm guessing deadline?) and it doesn't rhyme.

And I’ll have to turn my phone off

A picnic sounds intriguing but I’m busy that week

 

 

 

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I love it. I agree with some suggestions above.. 

Especially the sneeze like a fog horn bit. 

 

The last extra line (coda?) could be a switch to a more direct statement like "No, I know it's not me!" 

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