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Onewholovesrock

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Onewholovesrock last won the day on August 25

Onewholovesrock had the most liked content!

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About Onewholovesrock

  • Rank
    A Muse's Muse

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  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Central Wisconsin
  • Interests
    Music, Photography, Motorcycling, Good Beer.

Previous Fields

  • Lyricist, Composer or Both?
    Both
  • Musical Influences?
    Everything and everyone around me

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  1. Onewholovesrock

    dag gone

    Pretty good! I like it!
  2. Onewholovesrock

    Our music video on our cover of Brain Damage (Pink Floyd)

    Pink Floyd is my favorite band. Not a bad version. Production sounds really good. Do you guys also record these songs on your own? Or do you use a more professional recording studio? Video looks pretty cool for a DIY project! Do you guys record original music?
  3. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    Just new chorus ideas for reference???? I used to be so rad Not afraid to take a stand Kept my head above the sand Not a thought it’d get this bad My heart is wrapped in bad Never had that loving hand Now here I fucking am A sad and broken man just ideas for now 💭 Thoughts?
  4. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    Definitely great suggestions. I’d have to revamp the song but it might be worth it. Now you just created more work for me. Thanks! 😀 Yep. Hopefully he’ll be getting rid of the ball quickly and letting the play makers do their thing.
  5. Onewholovesrock

    Best opening line to a song

    You’ll take my life but I’ll take yours too You’ll fire your musket but I’ll run you through So when you’re waiting for the next attack You’d better stand there’s no turning back.
  6. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    Hey Paul, I think I like your thought process here. With a few adjustments I can probably call this done and move on. Otherwise I can dive into the many different ideas and turn this into a process. My last song Man Bun is still being tweaked as we speak. One of my most edited songs to date. Sometimes it’s a good idea to say, “good enough!” and move on. So that’s probably going to be the direction I take with this. A few chorus adjustments and call it good! As usual. Good suggestions and I look forward to your critiques. I wish I could return the favor but my lyric critique’s suck.
  7. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    Awesome critique as usual kuya!! After reading your critique I’m thinking this isn’t as vague as some others mentioned. You nailed my thought process exactly! That’s what this song is exactly about. I actually think the verse lengths are good. But I’ll look harder into that when I get back to work on this. Yeah the chorus probably needs some adjustments between the 2 halves. I did play around with a backstory. I didn’t like the “exact” storyline when I tried it. I think keeping it more open is the way to go for this. Unless I can figure out a vague backstory. We’ll see I guess. Always looking forward to your suggestions as they often help me with my lyric writing! Thank you Thank You!!!!
  8. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    As of the swear word. It’s just kinda who I am. I probably swear to much in the real world. So that sometimes shows up in my songs because that’s actually how I communicate naturally. My mom dislikes it! But I learned that shit somewhere. 😜 I believe it’s a big part of the music I listen to also. I often notice how the musicians I listen to and their fans swear often in normal communication. It’s just the way people like me are programmed. Refrain? This song has verses, chorus’s and a bridge. I don’t use the term “refrain” in my songs. I’m assuming that would be a bridge like part of a song? Maybe a quieter break or something? I agree, on paper the verses might feel too short compared to the chorus. But when I perform the song I haven’t really noticed anything feeling off. I’ll pay more attention to that the next time I play around with this. Thanks for the suggestions!!
  9. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    Thanks Mike. I will toy around with that idea.
  10. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    You said, “I am also one who loved rock” as if it’s in past tense? Do you not love rock anymore? Yeah maybe somewhat vague. But I think it’s just clear enough to understand the basics of it. Which will let it resonate with a larger audience interpreting it in their own way. Thanks for the heads up on the rhyme scheme problem! I fixed that with a line change. I don’t necessarily use perfect rhymes but words that match together in the way I present them. Yes, let the tweaking begin! Thank for your time!
  11. Onewholovesrock

    Collaboration Challenge: Emotional Impact

    I haven’t received anything yet from my partner Nuclear Winter. Hopefully soon!
  12. Onewholovesrock

    My Biggest Fan

    It comes in strong with the first verse. Very good! I like the overall idea. In fact I believe we think alike. 😀 I’ll PM you why. “Moved your head from side to side, as if to tell me no” had me cracking up a bit. I’m not great at critiquing lyrics. The only thing that feels a little off to me is the chorus line “I’m your famous pop star” I’m not sure why, because it makes sense. I think it’s just the way it sounds when I read it. I’d probably just ignore my thoughts about that. 😀
  13. Onewholovesrock

    Broken Man

    Update!!! Can you guys look at the last two chorus lines? I prefer the lines in parentheses. But not sure if switching away from “I” works or not? Thanks!! V1 I’m not who I think I am Thought I was strong Swallow all the shit I’m in (updated) Everything has turned out wrong Ch I need a helping hand My heart is wrapped in bad I know I’m not this sad But here I fucking am I didn’t take a stand My head is packed with sand I used to be so rad (might think of me as rad?) I’m now a broken man (but I’m a broken man?) V2 I’m not where I oughtta be Lost and alone Leave behind no history All I have are stupid songs Ch I need a helping hand My heart is wrapped in bad I know I’m not that sad But here I fucking am I didn’t take a stand My head is packed with sand Might think of me as rad??? But I’m a broken man???? Br I need to find that place That place where I belong I belong I need to find my place My place where I belong I belong Chorus
  14. Onewholovesrock

    Too Late (live)

    Nice job man! 👍
  15. Onewholovesrock

    Underwater

    I agree with many of the above critiques. I’m also not in love with the word Abattoir for whatever reason. I don’t like the “Than when I’m at work” line In my perfect wonder-world “Beneath” the sea sounds much better Otherwise I love the bridge. My favorite part
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