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=Bob=

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=Bob= last won the day on October 20

=Bob= had the most liked content!

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About =Bob=

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    Time Waster

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    Idaho
  1. I believe I have offended some of you in the past. I won’t try to recall any specific incidents as I would rather not drown in all the water that has passed under the bridge. I just want to apologize for anything I’ve said that has made anyone feel uncomfortable. I am aware that sometimes the way I converse probably doesn’t always come across in a pleasant manner and so I may often sound gruff or irritated or maybe I sound like a know-it-all. I have no excuse for any of that unsavory behavior however I am trying to make changes in myself, even if it may be a little too late. So if I have offended you, please accept my sincerest apologies and feel free to PM me if you want to discuss anything in detail. Thanks everyone, =Bob=
  2. The Barfly Maneuver

    I really like a lot of this, especially the line, "A C note’s too much for the asking but a Jack is my opening bid." Somehow the story feels like it needs something to make it feel complete. I wanted to hear more from her about her story. I had never heard of "Pappy van Winkle’s Reserve" so I looked it up and that's some high end stuff! Now that I have that image in my mind it really helps when I read the lyrics. Enjoyed the read! =Bob=
  3. Snakebite Viv

    Personally, I really like "lair" in this context. I see the term associated with snakes in entertainment, for example, "Witchcraft XII: In the Lair of the Serpent." And always go with what you believe in. =Bob=
  4. All Unicorns & Rainbows

    Just a thought but the lines: All unicorns & rainbows would fade me I need darker hues, the way Nature made me Could be: All unicorns & rainbows won't shade me I need darker hues, the way Nature made me "Throwing shade" and "shade me" are current common terms for hurt or contempt. And the normal meaning of shade seems to go well with the "darker hues" as well. And as always, it's totally up to you. =Bob=
  5. All Unicorns & Rainbows

    I need a raging river to drown in now and then A really great line! =Bob=
  6. Christmastime Is Over

    To me, it would be a shame to lose that great internal rhyme and the difference between can't and won't isn't enough to make it worth it. But of course, you should always go with what you feel works best for your lyric. =Bob=
  7. Precious Memories

    You have a nice, tender lyric here. I see a couple places where you change tense. You start with "him" then switch to "you". That's OK sometimes, but in your lyric it seems like it hurts the flow: I still think about him now and then It's sad to think how it all turned out Life is beautiful in every way Our lives they ebb and flow each day I think about you and love is all I feel for these precious memories That you gave to me I'm thanking you, yes I do Maybe that should be consistent. Enjoyed the read. =Bob=
  8. Christmastime Is Over

    LOVE IT! That's a great ending! =Bob=
  9. Warning Signs

    Nice! I think the line, "So slide on over let’s get up to no good" I would try to use "down" as in "So slide on down and let’s get up to no good ." Enjoyed the read! =Bob=
  10. Snakebite Viv

    Really enjoyed this lyric! There's one line though: Her love bite coursed its way through my veins Her bite wouldn't course through your veins, the venom would. Enjoyed the read! =Bob=
  11. Rain and Thunder

    Everything is nice, keeps a good flow and the imagery is all good except the opening two lines: I don’t like a game that has so many of your rules Especially since you also referee They don't have that cool thunder and weather imagery. Enjoyed the read! =Bob=
  12. You You You

    And you should always go where your heart leads you. Try not to let any of us cause you to make changes that take you places you would rather not go. We're on the outside looking in. Cheers! =Bob=
  13. Can't Go Home When I'm Stoned

    So with the title being, "Can't Go Home When I'm Stoned" I was expecting to understand why. But I don't see that in the lyrics. I think knowing that would help focus the lyric on the hook. Interesting lyrics though, a little blunt maybe. Enjoyed the read! =Bob=
  14. You You You

    There are many ways of finding an answer to your question. One way would be to get TV show ratings by age group and then watch the shows that rate high for the specific age group you are targeting. You can search Google, I just put in "what do young people talk about" and found this survey: http://www.businessinsider.com/what-teens-are-like-in-2016-2016-1/ =Bob=
  15. You You You

    Your cat, your boss, your diet Your high cholesterol My man’s working overtime and I think she’s twenty-three I need some major surgery and I can’t afford to pay Younger folks probably don't talk about those things. =Bob=
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