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Barneyboy

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Barneyboy last won the day on June 9

Barneyboy had the most liked content!

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About Barneyboy

  • Rank
    A Muse's Muse

Previous Fields

  • Lyricist, Composer or Both?
    Lyricist
  • Musical Influences?
    Alan Jackson

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  1. Barneyboy

    You can't, I can't (edited 06/13/18)

    Look, this just goes on much to long with no real story or - it goes nowhere really fast. I think you need to focus on a story line.
  2. Barneyboy

    "That Empathetic Man"

    Yeah, sorry but Hang on Shep just came out and grabbed me. Keep writing the truth.
  3. Barneyboy

    June Lyric Competition

    Well 5 among this group is more than a lot. Doesn't matter if it was 2600 votes. Just my point of view.
  4. Barneyboy

    June Lyric Competition

    Maybe people are voting honestly. From my perspective, it seemed that the voting this month was quite generous. A lot of 1's and 1.5's, really?
  5. Barneyboy

    Gone Gone Gone

    I'm curious as to why you capitalize the second half of each line in the v's and ch but not the br. So, you're just a one nighter breaking hearts.
  6. Barneyboy

    How would you like it (Revised - 07/01/18)

    Reads like a lecture and not a lyric.
  7. Barneyboy

    Life is a Fleeting Thing (updated 07/05/2018)

    I would have liked to see a more positive message such as live cause you only get one. We're born then we die but enjoy it in between cause life is fleeting.
  8. Barneyboy

    Parchman

    Maybe went on too long. Good story though, reminded me of the Paul Newman's film (don't recall the title but I loved the song, Down Here on the Ground).
  9. Barneyboy

    What Kind Of Man

    It's an emotionally troubling story about someone so in to himself so that's all he cares about. I made some suggestions but it's your story.
  10. Barneyboy

    Lawlessness

    It's a plague that can't be beat.........Do you really need this line? You already said it's a spreading cancer. Children having babies To build an army's force .............Somehow, I still don't know how having babies fits into your theme of lawlessness. The monsters are free...........Personally, I prefer inmates as in inmates running the asylum.
  11. Barneyboy

    Voices Inside Myself

    Maybe too wordy. Can you shorten the phrasing? Maybe give some images instead of telling us the story. This is a bit confusing.
  12. Barneyboy

    Lawlessness

    V Educate the children To build an army's force Channel the hatred There is no remorse A jungle of fear Self destructive walking dead Infection getting worse For the future up ahe´╗┐ad This v just doesn't seem to resonate with me. The whole concept of lawlessness and educating the kids bothers me.
  13. Barneyboy

    Lawlessness

    How do you disrupt a social chaos? Doesn't social chaos, in and of itself, suggest disruption.
  14. Barneyboy

    Be happy

    I understand your attempt to make this an uplifting song but I think it still needs to grab some attention. I like the simplicity of this but it really didn't bring on a smile. Maybe a bit too much on cliches. I don't think you need examples of what makes you happy because this is just a positive happy song.
  15. Barneyboy

    Alexa

    SOK: Thanks for your re-read and your nice comment. Spanish: Sorry that you missed the virtual assistant part of my story but thanks for your thoughts. I think I allowed for the generation advancement by giving Alexa life now. Kuya: Thanks for pointing out the VA character. Fabkebab: Sorry you didn't like the depth of this one. I thought the plot was self evident but thanks for leaving your thoughts. Ty: I kinda liked my story line but thanks for the suggestion. Peko: Thanks. 9thSt: Well, I hope the next generation of gadgets takes a while. Thanks for your comments. Lyrical: Thanks but I thought the bad connection line was crucial to giving Alexa life. Kuya: Can't really use your ch idea as Alexa is now in control. Don't want to make this lyric too complex. Thanks, anyway. Paul: Thanks for your kind words. Clemo: Thanks. RNR: Thanks but I had to try and keep the technology theme. Don't want to modify the story because Alexa is in charge. Joe: Thanks. John: Thanks but the story is pretty much set in clay. Nectar: Thanks. Living large means living the high life.
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