Jump to content

Joey M

Members
  • Content count

    473
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    6

Joey M last won the day on October 8 2017

Joey M had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

39 Excellent

About Joey M

  • Rank
    Inspirational Muse
  • Birthday June 14

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Virginia USA
  • Interests
    Composing music (all genera), songwriting, art and ceramic arts

Previous Fields

  • Lyricist, Composer or Both?
    Music & Lyrics
  • Musical Influences?
    Country, Pop and Jazz

Recent Profile Visitors

3,214 profile views
  1. Hold On Honey

    This one is a reach for me. It's in that seldom used third person. As usual I have composed the music and melody and am writing a lyric to go with it. Hold On Honey Copyright 2018 ~ J.W. McMichael On a night when the stars hung in their Heaven Restless wind rustling thru the pines Closed his eyes he could hear the river calling Feel the warm embers glowing in the fire PC1 There was a a full moon rising from the canyon Lonesome cry of a coyote in the night He caressed the moist flesh of his companion Saw the pinion logs flicker in her eyes Ch1 She said hold on Honey Let’s take our time tonight Nowhere to be, the moment’s right Spoon me close and move real slow Tenderly and don't let go We’re going on a magic carpet ride There are moments a husband remembers He will treasure the rest of his life And last night in the snows of December As he knelt on the grave of his wife PC2 He saw the full moon rising from a canyon Heard the cry of a coyote in the vast His lips pressed to the stone near his companion He whispered soon I’ll be with you at last Ch2 He said hold on Honey It’s gonna be alright I plan to stay with you tonight I know it’s cold but please be strong Doctor said it won’t be long Until I take that magic carpet ride Today as the sun rose in its Heaven A restless wind rustling thru the pines When folks say all his sins will be forgiven Two souls met in the azure Winter sky
  2. Smile For Everyone

    Hi Mike, Barney and Paul, Yes, this one is really messy. I've got some good music....I feel. I'm after something with an attitude. It's not the type of song I'm used to writing. I knew I could count on you folks for good guidance. Between you, you've given me a sense of what I need to do. Hey Mike, Every point you made is on target. You always give such helpful input. Actually, this does have pop style music. I probably shouldn't have mentioned "country flair'. It's more rock. And I felt something a little more free form might work.....but it does need allot of tightening up. Thanks soo much. Hi Barney, Thanks for going over the song so thoroughly. Your comments will be most helpful as I try to improve this. I know it has a long way to go. But you've pointed out very specific things to work on. So glad to have writers like you to turn to for guidance. Nice to be back and to hear from you Paul, It seems whenever I end up with a descent lyric, it has had the advantage of input from you. I do feel the chorus, although it has a way to go, has something going for it..... but the verses are just way off the mark at this point. Good point about the school/fool rhymes. Just as well, this way I can rethink everything about the verses. I probably shouldn't put up songs that are this undeveloped and have you guys do so much of the work for me . It's hard to resist running to my friends for help....even if it is a little humbling at times. Everyone, I'll be working on this and will post when I've got something better. I hope you'll check back. Since I like the music want to see this one thru to completion.
  3. Smile For Everyone

    Happy New Years friends. This has music already. It's up tempo, sort of a rocker....with a country flair. Open to helpful suggestions. Smile For Everyone Copyright 2018 ~ J. W. McMichael You never know Your plans might all fall thru You’ll need someone To tell your troubles to You might think I’ll still be your plaything But I’m nobody’s fool I graduated from your heartache school You gave me my degree And I learned this trick from you Ch You smile for everyone Smile for everyone Suck it up and smile for everyone You pretend you don’t care And don’t shed a tear for your friends ~ You smile for everyone Smile for everyone Carry on and smile for everyone Until your heart has turned cold And there’s no memories in your head You smile for everyone The course of love Is like a runaway train There’s no free ride Tuition’s paid in pain It’s your turn to learn to be lonely And be somebody’s fool Don’t underestimate the boy who plays by the rules He’ll turn that train around And shut down your heartache school Ch2 You'll smile for everyone Smile for everyone Suck it up and smile for everyone You'll pretend you don’t care And won’t shed a tear for your friends ~ You'll smile for everyone Smile for everyone Carry on and smile for everyone Until your heart has turned cold And there’s no memories in your head You'll smile for everyone Smile for everyone You’ll smile for everyone
  4. Sorry to have taken so long to thank you for your thumbs up on Like The Fool I Was. I've been away from the forum for a couple months....and am just now seeing the feedback. Glad you enjoyed it....and thanks for the compliments. I'm hoping to soon post a couple more songs I'm recording. 

  5. Hey Derek. Sorry to have taken a zillion years to get back to you on Like The Fool I Was. I've been so busy with projects that I havn't been on the forum in a couple months. Thanks for the great revision in the chorus. Of course, that's much better....Ooh what a fool I was.

     

    Nice to hear from you....hope you are feeling well....and have a great holiday season!

  6. This new recording has numerous lyric revisions including a completely new bridge. Thank you everyone who helped with the first version in the lyrics section, and special thanks to Ron Bryan who stuck with me thru several revisions giving this song his special touch by contributing several great lines that helped clarify the story and breathe life into the bridge. I would love to hear anyone's comments or suggestions. Leaning On A Lamppost Copyright 2017 ~ Music by Joey McMichael ~ Words by Joey McMichael & Ron Bryan Baby I’m a little wasted Came out walking by myself again Down to the tavern where we used to go Baby I miss you so And I brought the bottle with me Lately it’s been my best friend Still feeling hurt, I wonder if you know Baby I need you so Ch I'm leaning on a lamppost down on memory lane Texting you while standing in the rain Leaning on a lamppost outside our tavern door Dreaming things were like they were before People hold the door and ask me Would I like to step inside I just politely tell them no Baby I can’t let go I can see you looking happy Dancing in the arms of your new guy Don’t wanna start a fight, so I’ll just go Baby if you say so Ch Br Looking in the window dreaming of the night we met Feeling such regret Baby I should have known Someone else would come along The time had come to take another step But Baby I took too long Ch More than just a little wasted And my phone is running out of juice Guess it’s time for me to stagger home Baby I feel so alone Copyright 2017 ~ Music by Joey McMichael ~ Words by Joey McMichael & Ron Bryan
  7. Alright!!!! Big improvement. Yes, keep going with this. I just love it.
  8. I Want to Make You Mine

    This has such a nice feel....and so authentic. It has a sweet tenderness that is captivating. And what a fine idea.....a proposal song. Yes the lyric is straight forward........but what's not to like in something so lovely. I want to hear this in a far away pub with a brew in my hand.....just candlelight and a pretty freckled face sitting across from me as I disappear in my dreams of yesteryear. Looking forward to hearing more songs.
  9. Just Where Did I Go Wrong?

    I just love it! Great vibe.....and super fine vocal. keep 'em coming.
  10. I was scrolling down the list of titles and saw this song. Glad I did. First of all, it's a great title......a really fine hook. Obviously you are a writer first and a musician second. Nothing wrong with that. Your musical ideas are quite nice and certainly bring dimension and purpose to your lyric. You'll continue to grow as a musician....that's for sure. You are on the right track with the way you have structured your progressions and melody. You're actually composing beyond your technical skills. That shows real promise. I'm not very concerned about timing since that's an easy matter....you'll automatically grow into a more precise flow the more you play and sing, and your melodies will grow stronger as well. Those things are not as important as how nicely you are handling and coordinating all the other artistic aspects of the song. Having said all that and having read the other input you've received, here are my humble thoughts. They simply represent my perspective and beliefs about what makes for a fine song. I think you can get more structure into your lyric as well as your music so that your song can have much more impact. The listener is always trying to make sense of things and find patterns that are familiar from stanza to stanza in a song. For maximum power, a songs Verses need to be distinct from choruses. Verses tend to be similar to each other in rhyme scheme and meter......choruses tend to be similar to each other if not identical in meter and rhyme scheme, but distinctly different from the verses.. They usually soar above the verses musically, and should be different from the verses in terms of meter if possible. Above all else, they should really emphasize the hook......in this case, "would you even care". I realize that there can, and often are, too many rules. But, in my opinion, it's still a good idea to impose a little order on things for maximum impact. OK. This is a very dark song. Nothing wrong with that. In fact I really like your theme, lyric ideas and your nice use of imagery. It's all about expression and sincerity. And you are indeed an artist. But I thought I'd have a little fun with your lyric and rewrite the song the way I would approach it. Of course, there are an infinite number of possibilities, and every artist develops their own processes. I hope you will consider it a form of flattery that I got a little creative with you fine lyric.....just for the fun of it, and to help get you thinking about a few possibilities. I didn't take real long in the writing....so forgive me if I've drifted away from your intended meaning in places. I would label the different stanzas for this forum so people can easily understand the song structure. Again, yours is such a fine heartfelt lyric and a touching musical rendition. I'm just trying to get you to fly a little higher by showing you how another artist, might try to take it up a notch. Remember, the listener grasps memorable phrases, meter and lyrics that repeat in the song......something to get a handle on. The emotional impact of the final song has allot to do with patterns such as rhyme patterns, cadences etc. So, for example, all first lines of verses might have similar cadences though not necessarily identical. The same thing is true for 2nd lines, 3rd lines and so on. The same applies to the chorus or, in this case, choruses (they differ slightly from each other in my playing with your lyric). The music needs to be similar verse to verse and chorus to chorus. Often the choruses are stepped up a bit in instrumentation and groove pattern as they repeat.....but otherwise they need to have an awful lot in common. Above all else......be sure to repeat the hook that is at the center of your song. I notice you are a little tentative with your vocal. There is no such thing as a bad voice. No matter what a persons voice is like, there is a way to use it that is expressive and captivating. The most important ingredient is confidence and projection. The rest will come naturally with time.....including pitch correctness and vocal quality. Yours is a fine voice. Use it loudly and proudly. Your soul is just peaking out from behind your shyness. Let us see it (hear it). No need to be timid about such a lovely voice and spirit! To help you see patterns that I used, I've color coded the rhyme schemes in the verses, choruses and bridge and shown the hook in bold. Would You Even Care Verse 1 I know I’m nothing to you I know I don’t deserve your help But when I stand in front of you It’s the only time I’m not in Hell Chorus 1 I know I don’t deserve your concern But if you saw the blade in my veins In the only dream where I win Heard the cries I hold in If you found my body wrapped in chains Would you even care Verse 2 But the knife goes right into This ghostly body of air Where the light passes through As if there's nothing there Chorus 2 I know I don’t deserve your concern But if you saw the hatred burning my mind red Saw the holes all around my soul As the cruelty takes its toll If you saw me bleeding in my bed Would you even care Bridge You see I only exist When you speak to me Though I clench my fists And fight hart to be free Chorus 3 I know I don’t deserve your concern But if you saw the knives thrust in my heart As they go deeper And the climb grows steeper If you saw them rip my soul apart Would you even care Verse 3 ~ Out I may mean nothing to you But will you change my end? I’m standing here in front of you Won’t you lend me your hand? I hope this has been helpful in some small way. But you've got a really fine song already! Joey
  11. Like The Fool I Was

    Hi Cindy. So nice to hear from you. Thanks for listening and for the comment. Yea, I moved here to the Virginia Appalachians from a big city.....many years ago. It was bound to creep into my songwriting. I almost decided against ever recording this one.....cuse it's a little mushy. But I decided to go ahead since it got a good response in the lyrics section, and more than a little help from my friends. So I guess I'll be posting a few additional songs that I've written with a regional feel.
  12. Nice to see you're getting good reviews and some helpful tips. This is really quite good for a "muse in training" LOL. Looking forward to hearing many more from you.......and I'll be interested to see what you do to further enhance the chorus on this tune.
  13. Hello Piano

    Hey Paul, I mean every word. To me this is a truly beautiful song. Wow, and I thought you had indicated you didn't play much guitar. That is really nice work.....right up there with your wonderful piano playing. I taught myself a little keyboard over the past few years, but am very lousy with my left hand......just a few chords and no rhythm with that hand .....I think of myself as more of a guitarist. Obviously......you have both instruments going for you.......more than a little jealous!
  14. I appreciate the help I received with the lyric to this song, especially Gary Hale's work on the chorus and Tex's nice idea for the bridge. I hope the rendition doesn't disappoint. Would love to hear any thoughts on this song, Like The Fool I Was Copyright 2017 J.W. McMichael She said this world belongs to lovers, better grab it while you can Open up your heart and let me in You might not find another love like mine One that will last until the end All the gold in California won’t buy happiness If you don’t have someone who shares Somebody who you can tell your troubles to Someone to love who really cares Ch Ooh, like the fool I was I let her slip right through my hands Like the fool I was, too busy making other plans Life goes on but I can’t forget After all this time I ain’t over her yet Wish I never turned my back on love Ooh, like the fool I was On a hill in San Diego in a mansion by the sea Too big for a lonely boy like me Party with my friends until the laughter ends I’ve got all the toys I’ll ever need But all the riches in the world won’t buy happiness If I don’t have someone who shares That girl I knew used to tell my troubles to The only one who really cared Ch Br Is it too late for me to make things right I wonder where she's at tonight Haven't seen that girl since then Lord, I wonder what might of been Ch Ooh, like the fool I was
  15. What a great title. Just had to listen to your song when I saw it. You have so much feedback already. I'd just like to say I really enjoyed it. The lyric is well written and interesting. And the music is very catchy....allot of fun. I think your vocal is right on target. My only nit would be that the chorus could use a little more instrumentation to better distinguish it musically from the verses.....something to make it a little more exciting. But that's a simple matter.....and hardly a criticism. All in all....a very nice job. Joey
×