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A Musical Key

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Everything posted by A Musical Key

  1. A Musical Key

    I Was The One

    Chaz -- For my tastes, a harder edge on the rhythm/percussion would add a little grit. I like the floating feel of voice and instruments. Nicely done.
  2. A Musical Key

    August Lyrics Contest

    Kuya,I suspected you had written the first lyric this month because it had the same unusual format as another of your recent compositions. Of course, everything is clearer when you're looking up from the bottom! (I knew shouldn't have entered but I had submit-it-itis)
  3. A Musical Key

    Underwater

    collegiate - having to do with college. Pretentious connotation. - I used it to suggest that abattoir was not a simple word that everyone would know.
  4. A Musical Key

    Underwater

    Not bad. Not bad. The word abattoir may be the perfect choice for the meaning of the word but it is a collegiate word. You sure that's the way you wanna go on this? Your message is clear but the desire to live under the sea does not resonate with me but I Di Di Did like the stutter.
  5. A Musical Key

    Favorite Things

    Kuya, your take on the ZZ Top classic is pretty damn spot on. Inspired even, It wouldn't surprise me if Billy Dusty and Frank performed this live as a parody.
  6. A Musical Key

    Lipstick stain

    Mick, if you consider, there are more words that near rhyme with stain that can expand yours story quite nicely: blame, disdain and shame to name a few. You can also use it with the ABABAB rhyme scheme. Hope this inspires a chorus! Accident or not That lipstick stain Will get me shot I'm not to blame There was no plot On that train
  7. A Musical Key

    Dear Hunter

    I hear this as similar to TS's song Tim McGraw. You could repeat the title/hook more often in the chorus. You could also add some explanation of why she's waiting for his letter. Or, you could remove all mention of the letter and make the song all about your feelings for Hunter rather than his possible response. Good write!
  8. A Musical Key

    Artificial Love

    Why not wait and show us the edited version? Take a stab at rewriting it yourself. That's where the magic occurs and no one can do that except you. After your rewrite we can help once we know the shape of your vision (in other words, don't ask for help on your very first draft.) My opinion.
  9. A Musical Key

    Let the heavens rain on me

    Very cool. Thanks for sharing.
  10. A Musical Key

    Under the Bridge

    Won't you please go back? Feels too polite for an army of trolls swarming your bridge.
  11. A Musical Key

    Sorry, lover

    Images and wording are interesting. Lyrics don't need quotations and are seldom centered. The reader should know what this song is about in the first line or two. The reader has no clue until "And darling I'm so sorry..." There's too much apologizing and images. A chorus with the hook "Sorry Lover" and trimming would help focus this. Good start! Everyone reads lyrics differently. This is just my opinion. See what others have to offer,
  12. A Musical Key

    Let the heavens rain on me

    John - SO MUCH better! Effortless read and meaning. You learned some things, didn't ya? These things aren't cheap. Well done. Of course, we'll be looking at your next lyric...
  13. A Musical Key

    Goodnight Texas, Goodnight Carolina

    I just bought a Townes CD box set (well okay it is only 4 discs) and I do find this lyric in the same vein. Intentional or not, the lyric stands on it's own. A few touches recommended (Billy's are subtle but good and so are Andy's suggestions, hell they're all good!) Hope to see more.
  14. A Musical Key

    This Is Divorce

    This is divorce, my friend This is divorce Adding "my friend" makes this instantly more relatable -- like you're telling it to a confidante.
  15. A Musical Key

    Molly Brooker

    Simon - Very nice. I didn't realize you had so many songs out there. Very neat and impressive.
  16. A Musical Key

    Sydney in the summertime

    My bad. I was trying to be clever and missed.
  17. A Musical Key

    Lawlessness

    Carl, l like where this has ended up. It has a distinct cadence and a metal (not rock) voice I haven't heard from you before. The tone is consistent and it reads like every word has been carefully vetted. Solid effort. I hear Five Finger Death Punch doing this quite well. Gary
  18. A Musical Key

    Sydney in the summertime

    Manly Beach? I was confused for longer than I should have been. My mind is getting soggy. You've been quite prolific with your lyrics. Pretty good. Keep it up, quay?
  19. A Musical Key

    Today Is Everything

    This arrangement highlights the best lines in the lyric. Better than I imagined in my mind. Congrats to the team!
  20. A Musical Key

    Molly Brooker

    SW - I was confused by this story. The message in the closing "Life is not fair" does not match the story. You play with fire you will burn is closer to the lesson here.
  21. A Musical Key

    June Lyric Competition

    I was one of the 4.0 voters. I found many of the lyrics to be substandard. Either the story was poor, the word choice was poor, or the lyric was not executed well or not engaging as they have been in the previous months. It's no secret I am a hard grader given my comments in Lyric Feedback. It's probably time for me to relax after a year of voting and recalibrate. There is such a thing as too much honesty.
  22. A Musical Key

    June Lyric Competition

    I especially enjoyed God Ain't In Texas
  23. A Musical Key

    MP3 killed the CD

    I Want My MP3!
  24. A Musical Key

    Hemp and Hops and CBDs

    Interesting John. But I'm wondering if it's all a little too much information. Seems kind of busy.
  25. A Musical Key

    MP3 killed the CD

    Best Buy just dropped CDs from their stores in the US on July 1st. Could be fake news since I haven't been in one of their stores in a while. The USB/MP3/downloads did the CD no favor. I guess now ebay will be the carrier of used CDs for years to come. Barnes & Noble carries vinyl and only a smattering of CDs. Amazon is king in the land of on-line digital music.
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