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Oswlek

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Oswlek last won the day on June 11

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About Oswlek

  • Rank
    A Muse's Muse

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  • Music Page
    https://soundcloud.com/justin-osowiecki-music
  • YouTube
    https://www.youtube.com/user/Oswlek

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    Male

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  • Lyricist, Composer or Both?
    Both
  • Musical Influences?
    Beatles, Radiohead, Trent Dabbs, Pink Floyd,

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  1. Oswlek

    Chord Progressions

    How about one chord? (Sorry for the poor quality, this was recorded a long time ago).
  2. My thoughts mirror what you've already heard. The 6/8 opening was lovely and the sudden pick up was awkward, particularly on the first listen. On 2nd and 3rd passes your vision started to clarify, but it still felt less like a useful energy infusion and more like you were just rushing to get through. This hurried feeling is particularly strong in the last chorus. I suspect you sped up even more, but even if you didn't all the extra stuff (not to mention increased line lengths) comes off as disorganized and uncomfortable. FWIW, I don't think the intro is too long, but I think the outro could be shortened. The re-entrance of the 6/8 time is a lovely touch, but it stays around for a long time without adding anything further. Yes, a few instruments come in, but not enough to create a swell or justify extending it so long. To my ear, a 20ish second fade starting at 3:25 would be much fitting, both sonically and thematically. The mild build as it fades would play into the message behind the lyrics. On a first listen, I probably would have told you to scrap the idea, but I think there is a worthwhile project here. Keep the intro, slow the pace in 4/4 (and be sure not to speed up even more at the end) and shorten the outro and I bet the piece would work a lot better.
  3. Oswlek

    May Song Contest

    Well I'll be a monkey's uncle. I really like "Child", but the speaker is talking to the younger me, so I fully expected it to struggle in the contest due to the narrow audience. I'm thrilled that it spoke to others as well. I'd consider posting it in the Songs Forum, but it would be mildly disingenuous since the only thing really open to modification is the mix. That said, if anyone here feels generous enough to offer a full critique, I'd greatly appreciate it. I'm curious what worked and what didn't. My top three were the two winners and Donna's, "All of the Trees", with "Trees" being my top pick. It had everything for me, a gorgeous musical landscape, touching lyrics, emotional vocal delivery and just the right amount of candy sprinkled on top. I'm just as surprised at its placement as I am about my song. I'll be back later with more detailed thoughts on all the songs. Thanks again, everyone.
  4. Oswlek

    May Lyric Contest

    I would not expect my leniency to have any impact on future comps.
  5. Oswlek

    Princess and the Pauper

    This is terrific. Strong lyric conceit that the music supports perfectly. The arrangement is clearly midi, but the idea is clear and it is easy to imagine this with more polished production. Your voice is terrific and the energy/feeling is just right. I hear what people are saying about the higher vocals, but I don't think it's a songwriting issue. The problem with them is that they are more pitchy than the lead and they are mixed too prominently. Give them some more reverb and turn them down a little and I suspect no one would have an issue. Well done.
  6. Oswlek

    Happiness ...

    I liked this lyric a lot. It appealed to the part of me that seemingly must interject some drama into even ostensibly optimistic messages. I was intrigued by Fab's response to it, but I feel the need to mention this comment in particular: I sincerely hope that you do not take this advice (sorry Fab! ). Right now you have a unique concept that feels like it offers insight into the human condition. Making it about a happy drunk would transform the song into a cliche. IMO, of course. Good stuff, Ty.
  7. Oswlek

    May Lyric Contest

    May Contest Results *****Congratulations***** The Winners Are: ***** GOLD Naked Near the Tree - DonnaMarilyn ***************************** SILVER The Truth Comes Stumbling In - PaulCanuck *************************** BRONZE Un Recognized Genius - Kuya Can't Write No More Love Songs - Iggy Another Life - AndyLeF ******** Naked Near the Tree DonnaMarilyn 3.5 2.5 1.5 3.0 3.0 2.0 2.0 2.5 2.0 2.0 2.0 2.0 1.0 2.0 3.0 2.0 4.0 3.0 3.5 2.5 3.5 2.5 3.0 58.0 The Truth Comes Stumbling In Paul Canuck 2.0 2.5 2.0 3.0 3.0 2.5 2.0 2.0 2.0 3.0 3.0 3.0 2.5 3.0 2.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 4.0 2.5 3.5 1.5 3.5 63.0 Un Recognized Genius Kuya 3.0 2.0 3.0 3.0 3.5 1.5 3.0 2.5 2.0 3.5 2.0 2.5 3.0 3.5 3.0 1.5 2.5 4.0 3.5 2.5 4.0 2.5 3.0 64.5 Can't Write No More Love Songs Iggy 1.5 3.0 2.5 3.0 2.5 3.5 2.0 3.0 1.5 2.0 2.5 3.5 2.5 3.0 4.0 3.5 3.0 3.0 4.0 3.0 3.5 2.5 2.0 64.5 Another Life AndyLeF 3.5 2.5 2.5 3.0 3.0 2.0 2.5 2.0 3.5 2.5 2.5 1.5 2.5 2.5 3.0 3.0 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.0 2.5 3.5 2.5 64.5 Another Little Angel Has Arrived in Heaven Vhannah 2.5 2.0 2.5 4.0 3.0 4.0 3.5 2.0 3.5 4.0 1.0 1.5 2.5 3.5 2.0 3.0 3.5 3.5 2.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 67.5 The Greatest Story Never Told Eric Borgos 3.5 2.0 2.0 3.0 1.5 3.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 2.5 3.0 2.0 3.5 3.5 2.5 3.0 4.0 3.5 3.0 4.0 2.5 2.5 68.0 Gypsy Heart 9thStLine 3.5 2.0 3.0 3.0 3.0 3.5 2.5 1.0 3.5 3.5 4.0 2.5 2.0 3.0 3.0 3.5 3.5 4.0 4.0 2.5 3.5 2.0 2.5 68.5 Human Doings and Human Beings Fabkebab 3.5 3.5 3.5 4.0 4.0 3.0 2.0 1.5 3.5 3.5 4.0 2.5 2.5 3.0 3.0 2.0 3.0 3.5 4.0 1.5 3.5 2.5 1.5 68.5 The World of a Child Clemo 3.5 3.5 3.0 2.0 3.0 2.5 2.0 3.5 2.5 3.0 4.0 2.5 2.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 2.0 2.0 69.0 A Little Meadow (Love's in Bloom) SongWolfe 3.0 2.0 3.0 4.0 2.5 3.0 2.0 2.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 2.5 3.0 3.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 3.5 2.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 70.5 Battle of the Bulge Tony P 3.5 3.5 2.5 3.0 4.0 3.5 2.0 2.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 2.0 3.5 3.0 2.0 3.5 3.5 3.0 3.0 3.5 2.5 4.0 71.5 The Deep End A Musical Key 3.0 3.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 4.0 2.5 3.0 2.5 3.0 3.5 2.0 2.5 3.0 4.0 2.0 3.5 4.0 4.0 3.0 4.0 3.0 3.0 72.5 Rock Bottom Gary Hale 3.5 3.5 2.5 4.0 2.5 3.5 3.0 3.0 2.0 3.5 2.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.5 2.5 3.0 2.5 72.5 Time ART1108 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 3.5 1.5 2.0 3.0 4.0 3.0 2.5 3.0 4.0 4.0 2.5 3.5 3.5 2.0 73.0 You're a Winner Tonight Irwin Abrigo 3.5 3.0 3.0 4.0 3.0 3.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 1.5 3.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 4.0 3.0 3.5 3.5 2.0 73.5 Shadow of Our Guns Peko 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.0 3.0 2.5 3.5 3.0 2.5 3.0 3.5 4.0 3.5 2.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 3.5 3.5 2.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 74.0 Happiness.... Ty Cob 3.0 3.0 4.0 3.0 3.5 3.0 2.0 3.5 2.0 3.5 3.0 3.5 2.5 4.0 3.0 2.5 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.0 4.0 3.5 4.0 74.5 Alexa Barneyboy 3.5 3.5 2.0 4.0 3.5 4.0 2.5 3.0 3.0 2.5 3.5 3.0 2.0 3.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 4.0 4.0 2.5 4.0 2.5 4.0 74.5 Waiting On You Blues Short Order Kook 3.5 3.0 3.5 4.0 2.5 3.0 3.0 2.0 2.0 3.0 3.0 4.0 3.5 3.5 2.5 3.5 4.0 4.5 4.0 3.0 3.5 4.0 3.0 75.5 Call Me By Your Name Margaret Maude 3.5 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.5 2.5 3.5 3.0 3.5 3.5 3.5 4.5 2.5 4.0 3.0 3.5 4.0 3.5 4.0 2.5 3.5 3.5 3.5 79.5 Three Wishes Lyrical 3.0 4.0 4.0 4.0 3.5 4.0 3.5 4.0 1.5 3.5 4.0 3.5 2.5 4.0 2.5 3.5 3.5 4.0 4.5 1.0 4.5 3.5 4.0 80.0 Caged Birds Tracy Somebody 3.5 3.5 4.0 4.0 3.5 4.0 3.5 3.0 2.0 3.5 3.5 4.0 3.0 3.0 4.0 3.5 3.0 4.0 4.5 3.5 4.0 3.0 3.5 81.0 Also The Rain was disqualified...... Congrats to all involved! Great month everyone!
  8. Oswlek

    May Lyric Contest

    I must confess to being surprised to see complaints about a trivial extension due to the large number of missing scores. No one's career hangs in the balance here, it's just a fun exercise to spur creativity and provide another type of feedback. FWIW, the two people I've heard back from both thought they had submitted scores, one of which I know has had tech issues sending me PMs in the past. I have no regrets about taking a few extra hours to see what was up.
  9. Oswlek

    May Lyric Contest

    I'm still waiting for score cards from four entrants, some of which are site regulars. If it were one person, I'd probably just tally and move on, but with it being that many I've sent PMs and I'm going to give it another day.
  10. Oswlek

    Virtual song-swap-open-mic?

    I'd consider it, presuming the schedules align.
  11. Still waiting on three contestant scores. They need to be in by tonight!
  12. As we careen our way toward the deadline, we're still waiting on quite a few entrant score sheets. And of course non-participants still have time to provide their thoughts as well.
  13. Oswlek

    May Lyric Contest

    May Voting TIME TO SCORE! • Voting (scorecards) will take place Monday - May 28 through --------- Monday - June 4 Midnight (PST) • I'll post the results on Tuesday - June 5 PLEASE READ BEFORE SUBMITTING YOUR SCORES: 1. Please title your post, "LYRIC SCORES." 2. When you send me your scores, put the number to the left of the song title, like this: "1.5 - Song Title." 3. Also important…leave a blank spot for your song, but keep the title in the list. For example, if your song title is "Cat Puke Soup," your scores should look like this: 4.5 Song Title 3.0 Song Title ...Cat Puke Soup 1.5 Song Title 4. Please read and rate each lyric using the scoring table below (Scores of 1.0 and 5.0 should be rare). Copy and paste the list at the bottom of this post and insert your score to the left of each title. Then send your scores to me them to me (Oswlek) in a Private Message before Midnight (PDT) Monday - June 4 - Do not rank the songs, from 5 down to 1; use the criteria below - Do not rank the songs against each other; use the criteria below - Do not score your own lyric If you are a contestant, you must provide scores or your entry will be disqualified Ask yourself how well the lyric flows/rhymes. Does it create emotions? Can you imagine it set to music? 1.0 - Excellent. 1.5 - Almost Excellent 2.0 - Very Good 2.5 - Good 3.0 - Above Average 3.5 - Average 4.0 - Below Average 4.5 - Poor 5.0 - Very Poor Here are the lyrics: Un Recognized Genius Happiness.... The Truth Comes Stumbling In The World of a Child Battle of the Bulge A Little Meadow (Love's in Bloom) Three Wishes Gypsy Heart Waiting On You Blues The Rain Human Doings and Human Beings Time Another Little Angel Has Arrived in Heaven Call Me By Your Name The Greatest Story Never Told Shadow of Our Guns The Deep End You're a Winner Tonight Caged Birds Can't Write No More Love Songs Alexa Naked Near the Tree Rock Bottom Another Life ***************** Please vote even if you don't have an entry
  14. Oswlek

    May Lyric Contest

    I'm pretty sure that's all the entries. I'll be back later to post scoring rules, but they'll be the same as prior months if any experienced members feel like getting a head start.
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