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Hey thanks Malcolm. i have considered cutting the long ending, but I hate to. My intent is to kind of "force" the listener to reflect in the final minute. Hopefully my words stir some thinking, and the ending is intended to be a "bed" for thought. Not sure this comes through however.
Maybe it could be more interesting then just a simple solo over the freeway sound ?? Or maybe I'm crazy and I should cut it.
Thanks for listening and giving feedback! As soon as my day job stops kicking my butt, I plan on redoing this one with all the great feedback I've received.
Ouch! Ouch! My lyric has been dismissed as inferior! Actually, I completely understand the comment, but challenge the general assumption or philosophy. I’m aware of all the basic “rules” of lyric writing including “showing”, imagery, description, and often a literal story where everyone understands what everything means, and it is all spelled out, etc. BUT, I also feel that many of these “rules” developed when lyrics are viewed as a stand-alone finished product (which they aren’t), and there is no music or vocals. The lyrics are often “overdone” in order to compensate for the lack of music (like a poem), and don’t necessarily make for the best resulting vocals/song.
I am all for imagery, but I don’t think it should be forced. And if given too much priority (like anything else), it’s actually a constraint. IMO, there are many other factors to consider: Flow of the words, sound of the words, rhyming, rhythm, sing-ability, intent/purpose of the song, topic of the song, genre, music style, vocal style, etc. Personally, I am heavy on the “sound” of the words. I can like a song where it is difficult to make out many of the words, but that’s just my own weirdness.