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Randy P. Gendron's Profile

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Lyrics Feedback (45 posts)
25-May 10
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You and a few others :^)
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Posts I've Made

  1. In Topic: T-minus Immortality (seconds from eternity)

    Posted 11 Sep 2016

    Hi Mike B - Appreciate you mentioning the rhyme pattern. I do have a simple chord progression and flatline melody. They're not worthy of airtime but the do convey my intention to create a musical feeling with the combination of perfect and non-perfect rhymes. (Also hoped the use of near identical couplets would further support my efforts) Perhaps the obvious end rhymes that open the verses create a want for more of the same throughout. Definitely worth a reconsider... as for now, thanks for sharing your your time and thoughts.

    Hello SongWolfe - This is based on my inner conflict about life support as a way to prolong life, manage pain and suffering, until a cure or death arrives. Hence the use of the word 'plug' in the bridge. These images and emotions are real-life experiences so I'm thankful you found them authentic. I've made changes regarding your input and expect more will find their way in as I continue my rewrites. Thank you for taking time to read and reply what you consider standouts and worthy of tweaks.

    Good afternoon Joey - I did not want to come across as judgmental or in your face about this subject so your softness, tender, spiritual, and touching descriptions help me believe I've achieved this goal. Creative confidence can be hard to find when the lyric story is sensitive and the approach is unconventional. Thank you for thinking this powerful and worthy of your time and compliments.
  2. In Topic: Original song (ambient folk)

    Posted 20 Aug 2016

    Very Cool! This feels complete and awesome as is - to me (versions 1, 2 and 3 + video). Love your frenetic guitar and the vocal effect for the lyrics - very much! But it could also grow into something different (maybe better?) with dynamic and instrument variety... something to extend the song over the 1 minute 30 mark. I'm no producer so I can only suggest things you might find interesting and inspiring as you carry on. Two are: Who's Feeling Young Now? - Punch Brothers and Familiarity - Punch Brothers . Yep, both are more melodic & lyrical and the second has the complete opposite tempo but I think they have folk ambient "moments/intentions" worthy of a listen. Oh'n case you're curious, if the Brothers' posted here, I'd recommend you to them.

    I'm a fan in the forward most looking way... Posted Image
  3. In Topic: Poor Wee Mouse

    Posted 12 Aug 2016

    Too ready for bed to express the many why's but I want it known I love this wee mouse and his heroic lyric ! Posted Image
  4. In Topic: The Weather Man

    Posted 9 Aug 2016

    This is a pleasure to hear every time I come back to it. My first few listens were on YouTube so I had no knowledge of your atheist point of view but it's not surprising how your song still leads me to the glory of God. For personal and relative reasons but mostly because the song believes its own story and that story is Biblical. In a similar way, Leonard Cohen, a Zen practicing Jewish man has also written many impressive songs about Catholic heroes and Christian struggles; Song of Bernadette, Joan of Arc, and The Future are three I know well enough to think them akin to your out looking in approach. So in sum, as much as I'm inspired by worship songs written for worship sake I am equally blessed by songs that have no heavenly intentions but to sound earthly good.

    Sorry, Daniel, if my ramble and positive feelings miss the intended goal for critiques but your Weather Man reminds me of the One I love and worship so I didn't want to keep this compliment to myself... Posted Image
  5. In Topic: The Reader of Palms

    Posted 8 Aug 2016

    Enjoyed this very much, Donna Posted Image The only polish I might consider useful is to feature the hands only in the chorus by changing this literal 'reader' image, She closes her eyes while caressing my fingers, into something also fortune teller-y but not about hands (helpful, eh? Posted Image ) . That being that, I do love that she reads blind, by feel, so maybe something about the wisdom of her cataracts or the insight of glaucoma. Posted Image

    I'm not a song stalker but this, for some reason, gives me the same cool vibe as the intro to Keeper of Hearts. Posted Image

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Member Title:
Active Muse
50 years old
April 1, 1966
Jesus, Susie, Family, Friends, Music, Painting

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